4 more days

Four more days... Four more nights... Then the day will ahve come... It's coming... But way to slowly... The days seem to last foreve... The nights are filled with sleeplessness... Excitment, Sadness, Fear, Joy... I feel it all...
I am going to leave life as I know it behind. My job, my little sister who looks up to me, my mother who will miss me like hell and my father whom I can always laugh with, all that i'll leave behind.But I'll find so much more in return. The places I'll see, the people I'll meet.
This trip will hopefully complete me. Fill the empty place in my soul. I don't know what the empty space means, so I don't know what will fill it. But I'm pretty sure that the land of opportunity is the place where I'll find it. Maybe a new love, maybe just a new and stronger me, new friends or maybe a new carreer. There's something there for me and I'm going to find it. And if I don't find it there, I never will find it. It's there, I feel it in every inch of my body and soul. Or is that just hope and excitement talking.
It will be good and bad to leave here. I'll miss alot about here, a lot of people, and lord knows I already miss my job. But it will be good to have some distants, to get some more perspective. On the direction I'm headed and the path I've already travelled.

All I really hope is that I'll come back a stronger and more complete person. Without the stress of the past. Without the mixed feelings about B. and without the hope of something more. Because I'll have the more. i'll have had this trip and it will make me stronger and more complete. I'm pretty sure of that to. Ofcourse I'm reserving the right to get back on that if it turns out I don't find out what I'm looking for...
What if people here won't even miss me though. Or I come back to changed, to different. My life is already headed in a much different direction than that of most of my friends. My only reall fear is that people here will forget about me. But there's only one way of finding out and that is by leaving and actually coming back. I know my mom would kill me if I decided to stay there. She says I should at least finish school. And I should. But I'll see how it is there soon enough.
Just 4 more days... just 4 more nights... Then I'll be off... Hope my cold will be over by then though!