Just another day

So, I started the babysitting job yesterday... The times changed though, so I was only there from 3.30 till 5.30 pm. Just 2 hours and still I got 30 bucks for it. Not a bad deal if I say so myself. And Amy's kids are great. Her sons name is Carlin, he's 10 years old. And her daughters name is Danielle, she is 6 years old. Such a sweet girl. I was actually extremely overpaid seeing as in the are really sweet kids, that basically entertain themselves and after 45 minutes there, Carlin was picked up for baseball practise so I just had to watch Danielle. How hard can it be to entertain a 6 year old. I tell you, not hard at all. Just let them do all the talking and the showing.

It was so sweet though, when the grandmother came home I could go home. When I said goodbye Danielle gave me a hug and asked me if I would come back again. I guess she liked me then. Such a pretty girl too. Really sweet. This might be the easiest job ever. And one of the best paid ones that's for sure. I hope Amy calls me soon saying she needs my services again...

I was planning on taking the dogs for a walk again this morning, but I had another one of my cleaning frenzies and ended up cleaning the walls in the shower, seriously... How exciting can life be right, haha. And by the time I was done it was 1 o'clock already and that means it's the warmest time in the day. And Chevie was still pooped from the walk yesterday and the day before (pansy), so I figured I would give the dogs a break. That is, we're going for a walk around 4 and not in the morning, haha. See if Chevie survives it. Niko has been OK with it so far. And I definitely need the exercise. All that Mexican food has put on a lot of weight. So I have been dieting. The problem with dieting though, is that whenever you try to eat less, food becomes a obsession and everything looks and sounds good and all you really want is to eat a juicy, greasy cheeseburger...

One thing I am doing though, is cutting down on my smoking... yeeh me.... The first two days weren't the best, but after that it gets easy to just smoke one to 3 a day or even none at all... How proud am I of me... But seriously the combination of cutting down on smoking and dieting. How bad a time is my body having now right....hihi.... Owh well, Like my mom always says; "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger"....

Gotta get ready for the walk now... Rhi gave me directions to a park yesterday, might take them there. But I do need to get home on time for dinner though. We're going out for Sushi again!!!! yeeh.... So that gives me about an hour to walk, then a half an hour to get shower and get ready... hmmm... People who know me, also know that I'll never make it... But sure as hell am going to try, hihi..... Race against the clock, always fun...

And I need the walk to get some stress and tiredness out of my body as well. Woke up this morning wanting to go back to sleep (insomnia kept me up again) but when I looked up at the ceiling there was a big spider there. Right over my bed. Just sitting there, staring at me with it's beady eyes while slightly moving it's legs, causing me to completely freak out, jump out of bed, grab the vacuum, vacuum him up and them the whole rest of the room just to be sure the damn thing died in there...... and then it was impossible for me to go to sleep again, obviously... (sigh)

So, a little update. Rhiannon and I found the best Sushi place EVER!!!!! Seriously though, it was busy there so we had to wait in line to get in, but it was so worth it. And eventhough we were like 5th in line we only had to wait like 10 minutes. Then we got saited and we noticed that it was Happy Hour. So that only made it even cheaper. But seriously, we had a little thing of Saki which was good for 4 shots in total, a beer, water, an ice-tea, 2 little shrimp-eggrolls, miso-soup, green beans, beef-something and 3 rolls of sushi in total. (One roll is good for 8 pieces of Sushi). And then we got the bill.... which was only 26 something dollars. Owh my g.. How cheap is that, right. And by the by, we didn't eat it all, we had a doggiebag (well actually a little box) so Cale had it for breakfast this morning. I know, who in there right mind eats fish in the morning right... Well, obviously, he does...

After Sushi we drove to Hollywood Video and rented two movies. We haven't watched them yet though. We started talking again and later Cale came home. We called Dave and talked him into coming over as well. So we didn't get to bed till like 5 in the morning once more. Don't you just love weekends. Rhiannon and I were going to take the dogs for a walk again this morning, but we decided against it. Seeing as in we didn't even have a morning, really. I got out of bed at 2 pm, got me some tea and then crawled back into bed. I swear I'm hungry right now. Only had a bit of Apple Jacks this morning. Without the milk though. My body doesn't do well with milk... Owh well. Beter start thinking about dinner though....

Love ya all...

Job, sunday night

So I finally got myself a little job here. Babysitting... I start Thursday for one of Cale and Rhi's colleagues. Whom I can get along with great as well. Her kids are a 10 year old boy and a 6 year old girl. Basically I just need to be there for when they get home from school (12) up until the point there Grandma comes home at 5 pm. I get 40 dollars for it. So good deal I'm guessing. And it's going to be on a regular basis, so that will get me some extra money. That's all good.

Last night Amy (the mom I'm going to be babysitting for), Dave and Berkan came by after work. Rhiannon had already been drinking a bit seeing as in it would be her last weekday (or next day being one) to do so. I wasn't feeling to well. Had been throwing up the night before for no apparent reason. (I hadn't been drinking for a couple of days, so it couldn't be that). So I took it easy last night, for a while. I think I was the most sober person there. Around 4 am we all started to get hungry. So Dave and Berkan went out to get us some food. They came back with nothing because everything was closed. That sucked big time. But just then Amy had a brain fart and thought of..... Denny's. So we went to this other breakfast place that's a lot like Denny's and is open 24/7. I'm telling you a bacon burger is at it's best at 5 o'clock in the morning. Cale practically passed out in the dinner... funny. The lady serving us didn't think it was funny though, having 5 people drunk in the dinner. But what do you expect at that time. When you work that shift you can expect drunk people and coppers. Which were there too. Berkan had gone home already though. He had to be up in 2,5 hours, poor thing. But we had a blast. I finally lay my head down on my pillow by the time the sun came up and the birds were tjirping. And of course, woke up hungry 8 hours later....

Black Out

I swear, it was scary. Around 10 pm last night all of the sudden all lights and everything else electronic went out. Rhiannon and I both do not like the dark so we were holding hands in complete darkness trying to find some light. We found a lighter, that didn't work and some candles that were burned out. We got to light one candle and use that to find some more. So one big thing on the shopping list is, candles... We found 5 candles in total and made due with that. All you can really do is sit around and wait for the lights to come back on. We were so bored after a while, that we played I spy... seriously...

Rhiannon was going to pick up Cale from work around 11.30 so we waited around till then and I told her I was coming with her. No way was I going to sit around in a darkened house with nothing to do all by myself. They say that the crime rate is highest during a blackout... So we drove to the harbor and picked up Cale and when we got back the lights were on again, thank god. I hate blackouts. Not being able to just put a light on whenever you want to see. You couldn't even see your hand when holding it up in front of your face, it was so dark...

It makes you miss a lot of things too. No wonder people went to bed so early in the olden days. You can't watch TV, because there's no power. You can't read, cause there isn't enough light. All you can do is sit and talk and play stupid things like I spy which wasn't a big success for two reasons. One, it's a lame game. Two, you couldn't even tell the colors apart because of the darkness. Seriously....

Rhiannon just left for one of her last days of work at Harbor Excursions. She's cruise-directing this one and then she works tomorrow morning for the last time before starting her new job on Tuesday...

We had gone to Sea World two days ago and I got to see Shamu... The famous killer wale. It was nice... The weather was great. As it is today. But seriously, yesterday it came poring down like there was no tomorrow. It only happens a couple of days a year here that it rains and storms so much. So I guess people here appreciate the bad weather more than we would back in Holland.

Later that night (on Thursday) I went to a Mexican club called Dolce with Dave. A good friend of Rhi's with whom I can really get along great with. It was an Okay club I guess. I'm more the bar kind of girl and not really a club goer. But it was sort of both. They had some live-bands and after that they played techno. I was just lucky to be able to get in seeing as in I am underage here. But a friend of Dave, named Dave (go figure) got me in. Apparently he goes there every weekend and knows the guys that work there, so he can get anyone in. The people there were so slutty though. Seriously... The girls wore dresses that didn't even cover there asses and the guys... let's just say if we were in a comic-strip and there were thought balloons. All the guys would be thinking, 'I'm the man'.

We were planning on going to TJ on Friday, but there was some big shoot-out near the area where we wanted to go and two cops were killed, so we decided to take a rain check. Not a good plan to be going there when all kind of shit is going down... So I don't know when we are going now. Will have to set a new date, because we're only going with Dave seeing as in he's Mexican and all and knows Spanish. That would help a lot. TJ isn't the safest place for two girls alone. Or any number of girls as a matter of fact. But still, I want to see it.

OB

I went down to OB today with Dale. It was lots of fun. We played horseshoes with Vanessa and Brian and I met this other girl Lisa and her boyfriend Tommy. After Vanessa and Brian totally kicked our ass in Horseshoes we just sat on the beach and talked while looking at the ocean and the surfers on the waves. It was nice and peaceful and I felt at ease. I was just so tired because of our lovely neighbour starting drilling and sanding at 7 o'clock in the morning. Not great...

Owh, did you know that the pier at OB is the longest of the whole west coast? It is...

After the beach Dale drove me back to my place. We sat and watched TV for a little while but we soon started to get hungry. I had only eaten a small bowl of cereal myself all day. So he took me out to dinner at this cute little Mexican restaurant down on El Cajon Boulevard. It was nice. It was defiantly good getting out of the house and just sitting at the beach. I love the beach!!! And Rhiannon hasn't been feeling well the last couple of days. So this gave me something to do and Rhi time to relax a bit before going into work. This way she didn't have to worry about me being entertained or not, like I know she does a lot. But really... She shouldn't worry about making me happy so much. It's not good for her...

Anyways, I had a great time today. OB (Ocean Beach) is so pretty. And I learned how to play horseshoes and Dale learned that I'm a lousy aim. We all learnt something today.

I win

So last night was fun. Rhiannon only had to work till like 5 pm, so she and I met up with David and Robert (which I would meet for the first time) to go out and eat Sushi. And it was about the best Sushi ever... The best part about it was that the waitress didn't ID us but just said, 'I assume you are all over 21 right'. Of course we all said 'YES'. So I had a bunch of Saki, which isn't as strong as I remember it though. After dinner we went back to Rhi's house and later Dani, Damion and a friend of his, Skyler joined us in a game of poker. Let's say Damien hates me now because I kicked his butt big time. I came out the winner of the game... bring on the cheers...

After poker we played a different game with dice. The rule is that you have 3 throws. But you have to have at least a 1 in your throw in order to keep the dice. The trick is to get as many dice as possible with the same amount of eyes in as less as possible throws. The single eye, so the 1, is a wild. This means it matches every other dice. The rules, which are hard to explain beside the point, Damien really hated me after that because I won again. So then we decided to play blackjack, and I won almost every round... again. I think I might have scarred Damien's manly hood. Hihi....

Really, if we would have been in a real casino, or if we would have played for money. I would have been rich by now. It was all good yesterday. Cale came home late from work and wanted to go to sleep though, so everyone was out of the house around 12 o'clock or a little later. I cleaned up a bit and set off for bed. But once again I couldn't sleep. I stayed lying awake in my bed till almost 3 o'clock and then I woke up again around 6 am. Not that great. Eventually I fell back asleep again though. And now it's like almost 2 pm. I've only been awake for an hour...

Published again

So I guess everything is coming together for me over here. When it comes to my poetry for sure. Not only did I get a letter yesterday from an American publishing company stating that they want to publish my poem Birth. Today I got an e-mail from a British publishing company. They had read the poem that was being published this spring (so I guess the book's on the market now) and they want me to submitt a poem for publication as well. It's going to be an international edition, meaning my poem can be read all over the world. How great is that. the publication won't be till 2008, but it's awsome. I'm so happy with this. Already published in one book and 2 others lined up. And I've only been writing poetry seriously for about a year. I guess I am a lucky girl in some ways...

I just don't have a poem lined up yet that I want to submit yet, so I'm going to be busy for the next couple of days writing another classic, haha. Should be fun. Cale and Rhi are headed to work right now, so I'll have some peace and quiet :p.

Not really, I've got loads to do. Real loads, as in laundry. And movies have to be taken back to the video store, and the bathroom really needs to be cleaned. And then I can sit down and write my poem. I have a few unfinished ones, I think I'll just work on them. But of course I can't get anything done while sitting behind the computer typing this load of crap.

But isn't it great when I actually have real news to share and not just bull about what I did on a day... (hihi)

BBQ and BBQ

So we Cale and I did go to the BBQ Sunday. It was nice enough but weird. Everybody there worked together or were related. So it was a lot of boat stuff and such which I don't know that much about. Well, I know a little more about it know. I got to meet some new people again. There was this one guy there, who is a Turkish immigrant. He knows nothing about the American history. He seriously got me wondering how he got citizenship. I knew way more than he did about it. I think he might be one of the only people in the world who did not know about the 4th of July or what thanksgiving is about. Seriously...

We had yet another BBQ on Monday, so yesterday. It was way better weather than it was the day before and lots of fun. Twon, the neighbor was here around 4 pm and the rest of the people came about 5 or 6 pm. Danielle, Rhiannon's best friend I had met already and I get along great with her. David is Rhi's former roommate and I get along great with him as well. Besides Cale and Rhi, David is one of the people I see most around here. There were some new faces there as well. Bryan and Vanessa and Bryan's best friend Dale. They too work on the boat and Rhiannon had invited them so I could meet Dale. A single, 22 year old guy. I met him, we got along. Whatever, right...

I'll tell you one thing though. I'm not drinking for at least a while. God I was sick today. Tip: don't mix tequila, almond champagne, wine and beer. It's a recipe for a disaster. As I would find out at 6 o'clock this morning. Great.... My stomach is so mad at me. But it's all good. I'm still happy, haha. Owh but really, Almond Champagne is the best. Try it... Little amounts though... haha.

I had today gotten an e-mail from Poetry.com again. I'm nominated for Poet of the year. In order to really be able to win you have to go to the convention though. That July 19-22. You get to read your own poem up on stage and they got artist to perform as well. The events will be in Las Vegas, Nevada. In hotel Riviera on the strip. There's a problem though. I will be back in Holland by then, for just a month. So I won't be able to get enough money together for my plane ticket and the convention. I then there's still the hotel to consider, which would bring me to a grand total of about 1500 dollars. No way I can raise that kind of money in a month. So I'll have to bypass it. A nomination, for poet of the year. Shit... But who knows, maybe there will be others, right.

plans

I just finished reading the comment an anonymous person had left by my last post. I sure would like to know who wrote it. It really touched me. So, Thank you, to that person.

It's Easter Sunday today. My first Easter not to spend with my parents and sisters. As I hear it Shardae isn't going to be home for Easter either. It's hard on my mom. She feels like she only has one child at home now. Anyways, happy Easter everyone.

I'm settling in more and more here. Even though not all my days are exciting and full, it are good days just for being here. I'm thinking about getting a volunteer job here. Just for one or two days a week to keep myself busy when Rhi and Cale are working. And to meet some new people and such. Sort of get a life started for myself here. That would be great. I can't believe I've been in the states for 4 weeks already. It's even harder to believe that I don't feel homesick at all. I'm dreading the day I have to leave here already. But it's better not think about that too much. That would only ruin my trip, thinking about the end. I always wanted to learn to just live one day at a time. And I'm starting to learn it. I don't have every day planned out in detail anymore. Most of the time I don't even know what I'm going to be doing the next day. Sometimes I don't even know what I'm going to do the next hour. But it's all good. I was to planned, you know. Having lists of everything that needed to be done, time schedules for every day. I'd even schedule a day of leisure. Go figure... Right now, I can honestly say that I'm being lazy. And I haven't had a real chance to be lazy for a while. So it's all good. Just this week though. Next week, so starting tomorrow, I'm going to start jogging every morning. This time for real. And I'm going to start my diet. I'm going to write poems again and get my scrapbook organized.

Well, I wasn't that lazy yesterday night. I did shopping, made my dinner, washed the dishes, cleaned up the kitchen and washed Niko, the dog. How fun was that. I had to pick up the dog and put her under the shower. She struggled for a little bit but then just stood there. Unwilling to move at all and looked all sad like: Just get it over with. I thought the poor dog would be mad at me. But as soon as I dried her of she was really hyper and all she wanted to do was play and be pet. Cute dog, and white again instead of grey.

Right now Rhi, Cale and I just got back from Breakfast and grocery shopping. Rhi is getting ready for work and Cale is watching TV. We had plans to go to a BBQ today, but it's raining outside and we don't know if we could get a ride back home after we get there. See, I'm not aloud to drive because I don't have my license. Cale's not aloud to drive because his license was pulled for a full year. So Rhi's the one driving us around the whole time. Wish I were aloud to drive. It would make it so much easier. But even if I had my license, I'd need a California one and not my Dutch one and I'd need (expensive) insurance. Doesn't really seem worth it. I mean, I have a bike here and all...

Maybe I'll go jogging now. It's not raining that hard. Just a little drizzle and I could use the exercise. I'm getting fat... With all the Mexican food here, how can you not gain weight, haha.

little note / tribute

I haven't really been doing much last couple of days. Just taking it nice and easy. I'm so GD tierd. I can't get to sleep at night (or just don't) and I keep waking up early. Not good. But I'm haveing a great time. Rhiannon and I walked around a bit today so I know were everything is. That way if they both need to work I know were the stores are if I don't feel like cooking. It's all pretty close. Best thing, I got to drive again today. Only a couple of blocks. But damn, feels good to be around a wheel again. Automatic though, no stickshift. So way easy. Nice...
I had great mexican today, then great pizza with great beer, with great tv and great company. I couldn't be happier than I have been since I got here. This is my heaven...

update 5 am: I stayed up all night talking to Rhiannon. We just talked about our family and our feelings, about home and belonging. It was a great talk. I have learnt alot about my family here since I set foot on American soil and expect to learn lots more. It's not all pretty, but it's my family. It's good to know exactly where you come from. It helps figuring out where you're going. It's all good. Even the bad.

I just wanted to pay a tribute to my mom. A woman I love and respect very much and who has always been there for me. Mama, thank you for being the strong and caring person that you are. I love you with all my heart and will always be gratefull for what you have done for me and my sisters over the years.
I also wanted to pay a tribute to my dad. My rock. The one man I can always depend on. Who has stood by me and my mom and my sisters for all that it's worth. For giving us all that he can. I love you!!!!!

Fishy

Cale, Stu (a friend of theirs), Rhiannon and I set out today around noon to the bay. We bought tickets to board the dolphin, a boat and we rented rods. We were going fishing! It was my first time ever, not theirs though. I was so glad I dressed warmly. It can get very cold out on the boat, out on open water.

After sailing out for a bit, the captain stopped the boat and we could start putting our lines in the water. What you did was go to this sort of tank in the middle of the back deck to get yourself a bate fish. This were sardines and anchovies. The key was to get a real feisty one that would attract bigger fish. One of those little buggers caught me a mackerel. I got to rockfish as well, but they were even smaller then the bate fish. These were attracted to the squid that was on the second hook on my line. Half the time I didn't know if I caught a fish or not. But it was way fun. The boat sailed out around 12 o'clock and didn't return till 5 pm. It was messy though. The stupid bate fish would jump out of the tank and onto the deck and just flop around there. Some of them we tried to save by trowing them into the water of the wide open sea, only to be eaten by the seagulls and pelicans. The other fish that once flopped on the deck were tread upon by the other fishermen and lay scattered about. I did my best not to step on them. the biggest reason being that it is extremely grouse to have fish guts stuck under your shoes. Other bate fish that did go onto the lines were more likely to be eaten by a sea lion than by a bigger fish. (There was a beautiful dolphin out there as well). The rule was, change your bate fish every few minutes. They don't move around as much after a while. So many were thrown into the sea.
And even though the fishing was great fun. I did feel a bit sorry for the poor things. But they didn't die without a porpoise. I never had better fish. The deckhand there cleaned the fish we caught for us and send it out with us once we got back. Cale dipped them in breadcrumbs and deep fried them. We had the best fish taco's. Lovely.

Once we got home, everyone was beat though. It's more exhausting than one would think to be fishing all day. We just had the dinner and then sat in front of the tv for the rest of the night. Cale and Rhiannon were cuddled up together and I just cuddled with Niko (Rhi's dog).

I just now got off of the phone with my mom and dad. I had called my dad for his birthday, which is on the 4th of April. When calling him around 10.30 pm here, I get him on the phone right before he goes to work around 8 am in Holland. It was so good talking to them again. And even though I write a lot of things on my blog, it's different just telling them all that I've been doing. So my dad turned 52 and I'm not there. That sucks. It's my grandfathers (from my dad's side) dying day on the 4th as well, and I wont be there. It was my cousins birthday on the 2de and I wasn't there. It's going to be my sisters birthday soon and I won't be there. It's weird. But I'll have to get used to it. For when I move out here in a couple of years, you know. I figure I'd mention that fact a lot, my plan to move out here, so people can get used to the idea. Because I'm sure as hell used to it already.

I'd better go to bed. It's getting late and it have been a lot of late nights and early mornings. Hellish combination if it happens more than a week in a row. I've only been sleeping like 5 or 6 hours a night, when my body really needs 7 or 8. Ooops... what can I say. Gotta live life to the fullest right.

BBQ

Today was my first real day in San Diego. Meaning, that I woke up and am later going to sleep here. I met a lot of Rhi's and Cale's friends today. they are great. Love them. We decided to have a BBQ with them today, there were about 10 people here. It was fun. We started at about 2 o'clock and it's starting to die out now. It was great fun. I didn't eat much though. Rhi had made a slamin' good french toast this morning and I wasn't hungry for the rest of the day. That's a good breakfast. Basically the BBQ was more just drinking beer and having fun for me. As it was for the rest except that they actually BBQ-ed. I had some, but not much. Unimportant though. The important part is that I feel so at home here. And the people here are great. I really like them.

We are going fishing out on the boat tomorrow with a group. Basically the same group as today. Nice. Should be good times. I feel so at home and at ease here. This here, San Diego/California/the USA is more home to me than Holland. I can't picture my life any different than living here. I feel so good. And I'm not homesick at all. I mean, of course I miss my friends and family. But Holland isn't really home. I don't see me staying there for the rest of my life. But don't worry. I'll come back. You can't just decide to stay here. With green card and citizenship and everything. I'm so happy... my family is the best. Here and in Holland. I'm blessed. I realize that more and more with each passing day here.

Viva Las Vegas

I got out of bed at the early hour of 6.30 on friday morning. Grandpa was, as usual, already up. Coffee was made and all our bags were packed. I jumped under the shower and then we set off for Las Vegas. The drive took about 6 hours through mountains and dessert. I was so happy when we got there. Rhiannon had called and said that she was about an hour away. So Grandpa and I had a bellhop put our bags in the beautiful room of Bill's Gamblin' Hall & Saloon. It's a nice victorian/western style hotel right on the strip. It's only a small hotel compared to the others, but even then it was big. Nothing in Vegas is small!!! After that Grandpa and I went out to the terras of the hotel next to us, the flamingo. Then Rhiannon called again. She was almost there, but also almost out of gas. And worst of all, she had forgotten her wallet in a coffeehouse in San Diego. About 4 hours away. So she had no money and no ID. Grandpa and I got in the car again and drove out to meet her. Her wallet was found and all the money and cards were still in there, thank God. After that little adventure we drove back to Vegas and I had the time of my life there. I saw so much and I've done so much I can't even tell you. I saw all the mayor hotels on the strip, like the New York New York, the Flamingo, the Venitian, Bellagio (which was my favorite) and so many more. My age wasn't too much of a problem seeing as in we didn't want ot gamble in the first place and I got all my drinks via Grandpa and Rhiannon. Or I would share with Rhiannon.

Tip to all: Brasillian Margarita. best drink ever!!!! (well not ever, but you know what I mean).

It was a great weekend. It brought me even closer to my Grandpa and I know that I will always remember it. It was wonderfull. It you wanted to know what it was like, go there. I mean it. You can't really describe it. You have to experience it. I know I'm definatly going back!!!!

Rhiannon and I drove out to San Diego today after saying goodbye to my Grandpa. He's the best man ever, besides my own dad that is. We just arrived in San Diego and I did not like trip out here. All you could see was desert and I was hung over from the night before. The problem being, my hang overs are never headages. They are nosia and an upset stumache. Not what you want when being in a car. But all is well. My room here is great. But it couldn't be any diffrent than me finding a spider in it after only being here for 5 minutes...oops. So the room is being fummed now and I'll be sleeping on the couch tonight. After that, it should be completly bug and spider free.

Another tip to all: Jimmy Buffet. I didn't know any of his songs before this trip or anything about his fans, the parrotheads. But he's a great singer. And he has restaurants here called parrothead (great food). He also has a song called Margaritaville, and there's a place in Vegas named that way. We had dinner there and there was this whole show around it. It was great. Go there when in Vegas.

It's great weather out right now and I'm going to enjoy it. Love San Diego already. It's great!!!!