It's been a long time

since I have written anything. And there are some things that have happened. Not big life-changing things. But enough to leave an impression on me. For one, I just finished my first period of this school year. College is OK, not hard or difficult. But just a lot. My school takes up about 40 hours a week and besides that I work a full 32 hours a week in the hotel. I quit my job ate the coffee lounge after 2 months already. It was just to hard combining that with my job at the hotel and especially when college started as well. And seeing as in I liked my waitressing job better, it was an easy choice to make.

So as you can see I have a very busy schedule. A bit to busy sometimes. I can't wait to take a holiday, which I will be doing in March if all goes well. The only problem is that I'll be mega busy after that again playing catch up with school. Even though I will only be missing 4 schooldays then. I have only just started the second period last week and I'm already behind on my homework. It's lots of drawing and painting and stuff.Not only is it messy work but it also takes a while to do.

So, as to be expected I have been straining myself so much lately (also going out a lot) and so I have been feeling under the weather the last couple of weeks. My stomach keeps turning over and I'm just so tired all the time. All well, just 3 and a half more years and that will be done with to. Then hopefully I'll have my degree and will be starting a real career. As interior designer.

But now the other things that have been happening lately.
1. I have been stupid enough to fall for a guy at my work, whom just happens to be politically extreme right. I other words, he doesn't like foreigners and sees me as one. The really weird thing though. He likes me too. says he thinks I'm beautiful and even kisses me and 'made love' to me. If you could call it making love if the next morning all he says is; that shouldn't have happened. And then you can think, well if you really like the boy those things can happen. So you made a mistake and slept with him. Yes well, you know what they say. 'fool me once, shame on me, fool me twice, shame on you.' But what if it happened a third time. Should I just ask God for a set of brains then. Cause clearly, I'm moronic. How stupid is it, not to just fall in love with a guy like that, but also to let him use me like that. But then the big question. Why would he want to have sex with me and kiss me and be there for me in my time of need and how can he think I'm beautiful when at the same time he says that and I am exactly what he doesn't want. A Asian/American girl with a toned skin color and dark brown hair. Sure I have a Dutch passport and the dutch nationality. And sure I was born and raised here and so was my dad. But that just ain't good enough for them is it. No, you can't be Dutch according to him and his little friends when you have a colored skin and any other kind of blood running through your veins. When really, do you think they can tell by DNA whether you're German or Dutch or Asian or any other kind of nationality. No they can't. I mean sure, they can tell a lot by it, but not that (yet).

Then another thing. Cori Baker. My second cousin from Oklahoma, USA has been missing since the 9th of November. She is presumed died. The first time I heard about this, she had already been missing for 2 weeks. I was very upset after hearing this news of course. Cried a lot on the days following. I checked Google.com and found out what exactly was going on. But know it seems like they're not interested in the case anymore. There haven't been any new things on her for a week or so now. Meaning she hasn't been found either. The poor girl was only 13 years old. The man who did it, was her sister's 18 year old boyfriend. Can you believe that. It's just not something you expect to happen, especially to your own family.
I just hope she will be found. So my whole family can get some peace.